Whether we’re young people, middle-aged or old, we’ve all felt guilty because of personal actions that we’re not so proud that we did. Today let’s consider for a moment what role guilt and shame may have had in causing your chronic illness. More than you may realize, it could be a really valid concern particularly if you’re a teenager and a victim of peer pressure or you instigated peer pressure on someone else.

(Hint: Being teased and being the victim of peer pressure is a ‘soul wound’ that many people cannot ever recover from without getting specific help.)

Today’s young people case in point, Skye Dailor

If you’ve been around Chronic Fatigue Syndrome long enough, you remember that it’s been twenty years since 14 year old Skye Dailor took her life because of how she dealt with peer pressure and being teased about the illness. (Please read the rest of my thoughts.)

As I understand what transpired, one of more teenagers teased Skye at school and suggested she just end it all. Unfortunately, the young woman did exactly that.

Personally, I wonder how these teenagers, who must now be over 30 years old and adults, feel about what they did back then to Skye Dailor:

Do you remember the incident?

Does it stand out as a moment in time that you feel proud of?

If you feel shame and remorse, how are you living with the guilt of what you did?

Hopefully, there is remorse and a valuable life lesson learned for these people and all of us, too. Why? Because every action we take has consequences. Just like me, in bringing up this subject, this post may cause someone to feel guilty or shameful about something hurtful that they did to someone else.

So I’m saying to these grown adults today, surely you do feel sorry because a young woman’s life was put in peril and cut short. You did not try to understand her life or how sick she was. You dared to tease and criticize her and you said things that resulted in horrible consequences for your fellow classmate. I’m guessing that the guilt of that surely has followed you through your life.

I’m not suggesting that you forget what you did. Instead feel genuine sorrow and then find a way to move on with your life. To do that? You need a “healthy way” to handle these feelings. (Like Sacred Cellular Healing. See the links of this website.) Because you inflicted a soul wound on someone else, your soul and energy spirit are wounded, too.

Otherwise, the guilt you feel will ultimately consume you. It will impact your life and health in very negative ways. You will get sick. Poor health is a common, long term result of living with unresolved feelings of guilt.

I see this incident as a stark example of what I’m calling, Peer Pressure 101. Surely there are thousands of similar events. Peer pressure and harassment are certainly too prevalent in our society, whether they occur one-on-one in person, or through emails, texting, sexting, message boards or malicious blogs.

I feel great compassion for us humans who make mistakes and then have to carry around the burden of our actions for the rest of our lives. I can imagine that these particular adults we’re talking about today do carry around, consciously or unconsciously, quite a bit of shame and guilt and that it is affecting them. Surely twenty years ago, they did not intend the horrible outcome of Skye Dailor killing herself. They simply teased her and said ugly things. Pretty harmless, eh? NO! Tragically, it worked. Even so, forgiveness for these people is in order because we all make mistakes. If we don’t forgive each other, we’re putting ourselves above everyone else. That’s just not possible nor is it wise, because we’ve taken the bad feelings with us. Unhealthy energy and emotions beget more of the same. And all because we insist on holding onto our indignance and not practicing forgiveness.

Know that if you carry around shame and guilt, it will impact your health whether you realize it or not. I urge you to take a moment to check out last Friday’s Health Matters Show about how to be successful in your long term health and be an illness survivor.

Negative emotions that we insist on carrying around do affect us.

Need proof? 1) The chronic health problems you are dealing with today and 2) The additional health problems that will likely show up tomorrow. Negativity breeds negativity!

Alternative? To be strong, resilient and healthier, we must learn how to shed negative emotions and instead head our lives in more positive directions.

TRUTH: The choice of whether that happens or not is yours.

(If you have opinions about peer pressure, ridicule or any of the negative events that people with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome face, please comment below. If you have examples of forgiveness, leave those, too.)

Thanks so much, Cinda Crawford, your host

PS- Here’s a great article on forgiveness from the The Washington Post -or- check out Fred Luskin’s book on Forgive For Good below.

Several times in the last few weeks and months I have written about ME/CFS, Swine flu and the wisdom or danger of getting a vaccination. (See more posts about ME/CFS in children and young people later on this week.) Recently out of the UK, there is more news about these topics.

I encourage you to do 2 things: search this Health Matters Show blog/podcast and website for all of the entries on the appropriate terms. Then check out this new link at the ME Association. See their QuickLink tabs on the left.

Researchers in the UK are taking note of the correlation between getting a Swine Flu vaccination and the reactions of people with ME/CFS. Your reaction and your symptoms are important to them. The researchers only have 16 replies and they need a lot more.

What’s fascinating to me is that some people who submitted to the Swine Flu vaccination have had no reaction to getting it at all. “However, three people (3/16) have reported a more prolonged and serious exacerbation/relapse of their ME/CFS.”

Of particular concern is a single report of a previously fit adolescent who has developed a number of ME/CFS type symptoms four days after his vaccination. Whilst this link to the vaccination may be pure co-incidence, we do know that ME/CFS can occasionally be triggered by vaccinations, including the normal flu vaccine.

This case is being reported to the Medicines and Healthcare products Regulatory Authority (MHRA) by The MEA on the Yellow Card reporting system. And it is very important to make sure that doctors in the UK report all suspected adverse events to swine flu vaccination to the MHRA.

If you’re reading this from the UK, please help by reporting your experience with the Swine Flu vaccination and your ME/CFS symptoms. New symptoms or a worsening of symptoms is bad enough in adults; in young people it can be tragic and alter their entire futures. This is not the first time that a vaccine has been implicated in such damage in young people. Read the story of a young girl named Kenzie.

Thanks for dropping by and best wishes,
Cinda Crawford, host of the Health Matters Show